I don't know

Six days before Ev was diagnosed I had a conversation with my sister-in-law about how hard it must be to have a seriously sick child or one that was severely injured. We were beside ourselves with the thought of it and felt so fortunate that within our families there were no such tragedies.

Then Tuesday came and I kept thinking is this seriously happening? Am I dreaming? God, please wake me up! And then Wednesday we were given the concrete fact that Ev has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL). Jeff and I were asked some serious questions within 24 hours about the life of our child. Questions you never want to have to answer, questions I can't even write now.

So, how do we do it? Or, how have we gotten by so far? I don't know. I know that the love and support we have received from family, friends, co-workers, hospital staff and strangers has made us feel amazing. We don't feel alone or as scared when someone reaches out their hand, even if they don't know what to say. And, we have definitely felt the power of prayer and God's presence (I could write another post on this alone).

I don't know how we are making it, but we are...and I wish I knew how Ev was making it. He's tired and frustrated, but he continues to surprise me with his strength and resilience. Maybe it's all the chicken and chocolate milk he's consuming, or maybe it's the thousands of prayers that have been said for him.

I keep thinking of the ridiculous cartoon..."wind, earth, fire...with our powers combined, we are, captain planet." It's embarrassing that I even admitted that, but it's a good representation of what is going on. We can't all fight for Ev, but we can fight with him in many ways that will ultimately bring a larger, better result. So, each day, we all do what we can...and that seems to be enough. So, I guess that's how we are and will make it, one day at a time and trying our best.